Maybe it’s me, but reality seems to be spinning rather wildly these days.
I feel like I’m sitting in some multiplex theater with, oh, maybe a couple dozen movies playing at one time. Each one of them is a slice of my life, each as real as the other. I’m here in the middle watching the movie screens revolve.
Each of the movies plays just long enough for me to remember where I was in the storyline and to play my role in what’s-happening-now, and then the next movie drops before me. It’s like dancing between worlds, or like wandering through a maze of revolving doors. The old TV show “Quantum Leap” comes to mind, and I laugh. That’s it, exactly.
The main movie this past week was a horror show where poisons fell upon the land and the waters, including mine. It held some heart-wrenching scenes. But there were other movies, too. The smiles of friendship and romance and Valentine’s Day. Poignant stories of loss and grief. Scenes of ordinary life – cooking dinner, washing dishes – seen through a soft, golden lens. Peaceful strolls through pine woods and stands of oak.
Weaving through them all was the ribbon of reminders that I posted on my wall to help me keep my composure when the movies spin too quickly or get too intense. “Smile,” one says. I like that one. It works every time. “Don’t be trapped by the spell. You are free.” That’s a good one, too; it reminds me that I always have choices.
I told you in an earlier letter about the one that says, “Look around you. Appreciate what you have. Nothing will be the same in a year.” That one took on new depth as I watched an environmental catastrophe enfold me in its grasp. Yes. Appreciate what you have.
The four phrases of the Loving Kindness Meditation are on my wall, too:
May I Now . . .
Be filled with loving kindness;
Be safe and protected;
Be resilient in mind and body;
Live with ease and joy.
After I say them for myself, I look at my photos of friends and family and request the same for them, and then for all whose lives touch mine, which, of course, includes you.
I got to experience a vast range of emotions this past week. Somewhere in the middle of it, I saw a video of a man demonstrating how the strings in the lower range of a piano make powerfully penetrating sounds. The lowest would not only shake the whole piano, but the house in which it sat. I got a taste of the lower ends of the emotional scale as I took in what was happening around me.
And along with that, I got a refresher course in what happens when you’re there, caught up in the powerful frequencies of emotion at the lower end of the scale. If you don’t fight it, if you just kind of glide on its current and let it be there and let it be okay that it’s there even if its difficult to bear . . . if you can do that, you’ll find that you sink like some smooth stone in an unresisting stream and end up in a well of acceptance filled with understanding and love.
Not that “don’t fight it” is easy. Sometimes you gotta go through some shouting and tears to get there. But if you can get there, if you can just let go of the fight and let it be, it’s worth doing.
I hope that helps you in some way. I wish you the very best movies this week in the theater of your mind.
Warmly,
Susan
Image by Mohamed Hassan from Pixabay