Susan Minarik – Page 9 – Notes from the Woods

The Happiness of a Giving Heart

Have you ever noticed that feeling you get when you do something for somebody else? That little lift you get? That little burst of energy?

It’s such a clean, strong feeling, even when it only lasts a second or two. That’s what giving does for us. The boost it generates is life’s way of telling us that easing the way for someone else makes us happier, too.

That’s what “the golden rule” is all about. Treating others the way you’d want to be treated makes for increased happiness all the way around.

We’re happy when others help us when we need it, and when can help others, we’re made happier, too.

Giving stimulates our sense of our capability. When we respond to somebody’s need we feel connected to our hearts, the place from which giving rises,

Happiness researchers Foster and Hooks have this to say about giving:

“True giving, radiant giving, comes from the same inner place as deep happiness. It’s a desire to share our personal sense of worth and values.

“It’s having the self-esteem to feel that what we have to offer is valuable—our advice, wisdom, expertise, skills, physical labor.

“The manner in which we give these gifts is a reflection of who we are.”

That’s a very special way of giving. It’s not giving from a sense of obligation, and especially it’s not giving from a sense of guilt or as a compensation for feeling unworthy in some way. It’s giving for the sheer joy and beauty of giving; it’s giving from a full heart.

The highest level of giving, Foster and Hicks say, is giving in a way that helps other people live better, more independently and more effectively.

They found that many of the happy people they studied volunteered time in their communities working for causes they considered worthwhile. Some acted as mentors. Some spent time counseling family or community members.

Sometimes their giving was the habitual performance of kindnesses, stepping up whenever they saw a way to fill a need or to ease someone’s way. Sometimes they simply offered encouragement or gave appreciation to others, or brightened others’ days with a genuine smile.

Happy people, Foster and Hicks say, “give because it is a decree of their heart, letting their internal sense of contentment and joy overflow into the world.”

One of the most fulfilling ways to give to others is simply to share what you love. Share your passions. Whether you’re into music or carpentry, reading, gardening, exercising, playing chess—whatever you love, engage somebody else in it.

The opportunities for giving are endless. It’s simply a matter of being aware of them. Learn to find them by asking yourself, “What can I offer?” “How can I help?” “Whose life can I support?” “Whose day can I brighten?”

Share your skills, your knowledge, your emotional support, material items, money or time. Give of them freely, with joy, and you’ll find the giving returns more rewards than you could ever anticipate.

It builds bonds. It creates trust. It enhances life both for the recipient of your sharing and for you.

As a tool for enriching your happiness, it ranks as one of the most powerful. Make a point of noticing your giving this week and watch what happens inside you.

Wishing you a week of happy-hearted giving!

Warmly,
Susan

^{Image by Harish Sharma from Pixabay}

Painting on the Rocks

The leaves fall to the creek floor
like careless drops from the brush of some artist.
splattering the rocks with rust and bronze,
pastel yellow and shades of green. They and the creek
make a painting of their own. But this is no accident.
There’s nothing careless here. It took eons
to create this scene, time beyond measure.
All for this moment, this one breath of a day,
when the light and the air were just so,
and it was early September.

Some Love

All love goes beyond words.
Some of it’s so deep you can’t even think it,
only feel it in your heart.
And then there’s the love that’s made of
al the bits and crumbs of love there ever was.
Why, it’s so big that all it can do is paint itself
all over everything, right before your very eyes.

How It Goes

Sometimes I want to roll up my sleeves, step on into it
and hurl things, wailing in anguish and outrage.
I take note, you see, of what’s going on.

But it’s like the lyrics from that ‘60’s era tune,
either Moody Blues or the Beatles,
maybe you’ll know:
“Someone exploded a bomb today,
but it wasn’t anybody I knew.”

Another bomb? Too bad; so sad.
I take note and tuck it away.
The creek beckons. Trees are waiting
to be heard. Go now. Gifts await.
It will keep you sane.
And I did. And it does.

But as I said, I take note of what’s going on.
And from time to time I look beneath
the surface and am astonished at how vile
evil can be, what a cold and twisted thing
.
Then I remember the creek. And the trees.
And I am saved.

Rough Neighborhoods

Finding themselves on rocky ground,
surrounded by the broken and the fallen,
in a place where the sun can find only
brief and narrow openings,
some spirits nonetheless thrive,
rejecting excuses for failing,
choosing instead to laugh and stand tall,
to shine their light, to blossom in love,
to sing the Yes of the infinite song
and live free. If you chance to see them,
let your heart applaud.

Choices

One by one, the leaves decide.
Who will go first? Who will hold on?
Who will be the last to go?
Already some could not resist
the chance to ride the wind
and fly, free of all restraints,
to sail birdlike on the wings of air.
Most waited, savoring the familiar view,
savoring its changes. Neither choice
was right or wrong. Time would tell them
when to fly. And time, the creek told them,
has its way of doing things
in exactly the perfect order.

The Bridge

A turn of the calendar’s page, and here’s September,
come to bridge the seasons, to provide a pathway
into fall. The green of the trees still sings of summer,
but the first of autumn’s leaves have begun to tumble
down, to gather at the edges of streams and roadways.
It happens like that, gradually, so that you hardly notice.
Beneath the bridge, time’s stream flows endlessly on.

Sunday Messenger

A flicker of tan caught my eye
and, expecting a butterfly,
I glanced toward the window.
“Oh! A deer!” I said aloud,
surprised as a graceful fawn
ambled into view, then paused,
surveying the scene, listening,
every muscle in its body ready
to bound away. A Sunday messenger,
come as an unexpected guest,
so welcome a sight
for these world-weary eyes,
refreshing them, reminding me
the world still holds the wild and free.

In the Beholder’s Eyes

“Certain colors are beautiful together; other colors aren’t.”
That’s what she said, standing before her freshman class
of art students. I remember finding that a curious thing
to say. “Take, for instance,” she continued, “pink and orange.
Each has its own fine qualities, but never, when combined,
can they be considered beautiful.” The students took notes.
I started drawing doodles, tuned her out, fell into dreams.
I thought of her today as I came upon the wildflowers.
I laughed. Tell it to the bees, I thought.
Clearly, I was not the only one who didn’t listen.

Your Power to Transform

I looked at my list of tasks as my friend and I entered the store. Shopping for groceries was only our first stop of several. I was mentally planning our itinerary when my friend suddenly stopped one step into the produce section.

“Look,” she said waving her hand to encompass the whole scene. “Everything we need to live is here.”

Her comment shot me back into the moment. In the center of the floor stood several large tables brimming with colorful produce. On one, tomatoes and onions, shiny bell peppers, ruffled heads of lettuce and ears of sweet corn. On another, bunches of red and green grapes and peaches, apples and pears. Each table’s contents were arranged with artful care. On lighted shelves behind them relishes and cheeses, specialty items, salads and drinks beckoned.

“I love the way you notice things like that,” I told my friend. She has a real knack for appreciation, one of the choices for happiness we all can make.

The key is noticing what you value.

She notices how things are designed, how they work. She goes through the world with an appreciative heart, and points out the cleverness of a tool’s design, the quality of materials, the efficiency or kindness of someone’s act, and says so.

Happy people are like that. They look for things to value in the present moment. That’s a key: Looking for what’s valuable right now, in the immediate present. What’s good here? What’s true? What’s beautiful? What’s alive in me right now?

Embracing the Contrasts

One way to do this is to look at your life as if it’s a movie, and the present moment is the movie’s current scene.

It may not be a pleasant one; it might be a tragedy or drama. But you can still appreciate it as a scene in your unique life—being fully conscious of what’s occurring, fully aware of what you’re experiencing and embracing it as a part of the totality of your life.

Genuinely happy people don’t deny life’s sorrows and disappointments. They appreciate the reality of them and experience their meaning and depths. But they equally embrace life’s delights and moments of beauty and goodness.

They’re aware of the contrasts that make up life’s diversity, and of the way the contrasts contribute to life’s richness and mystery.

Because of their total immersion in their lives, happy people learn that no experience is wholly good or wholly bad. It’s all a mix. And all of it contains something to be appreciated once you choose to see it.

Sharing the Good Stuff

Happy people actively look for things to appreciate in others and they share their appreciation in words. They let others know when they see their good qualities in action—their humor, their kindness, their courage, their creativity.

Sometimes they appreciate how well someone deals with their struggles and fears. And because they share what they appreciate in others, they build stronger relationships—in their workplaces, with their children, with their partners, and with friends.

They even disarm their adversaries by expressing sincere appreciation of their strengths. “Well done!” “Good move!”

They brighten the day for strangers by mentioning something the other has done well. “That was so kind of you!” “You packed that so efficiently!”

You never know when a simple comment will entirely change someone’s day.

As poet Elizabeth Barret Browning said, “Earth’s crammed with heaven.” Turn up your sense of appreciation this week and prove for yourself the truth in her words. You might just find your world transformed.

Warmly,
Susan

^{Image by Dhanesh Damodaran from Pixabay}