This past Memorial Day found me thinking about a beloved old friend of mine. He returned from Viet Nam with a heart full of pain, developed paranoid schizophrenia, and ended up hanging himself one cold, winter day.
All wars are tragic, taking their toll on our hearts and minds long after they have past. That, I believe, is the ultimate meaning of the day set aside to remember those who lives were lost in battles. It’s a message to us to keep trying, regardless of our history or the odds, to find better ways to solve our differences.
Synchronistically, last week I happened also happened across Eben Alexander’s book Proof of Heaven: A Neurosurgeon’s Journey into the Afterlife. If you have heard that near-death experiences are nothing more than illusion created by a dying brain, Dr. Alexander’s vivid description of his own near-death will seriously challenge your assumptions. Until he experienced it himself, he, too, was wholly skeptical about the reality of life after death.
Like most who have had a near-death experience, he struggles to find words to describe his own experience of what he says is so profoundly rich and beautiful that it cannot be put into the narrow framework of human language.
It’s a fascinating read. And I found comfort in it as I thought about loved ones who have died.
Anyway, I remembered my old friend, his extraordinary personality and brilliant mind – the one that I was privileged to see and know beneath his mental illness and his pain. I smiled inside, feeling that he somehow got the greeting my heart sent him and returned his own beams of love.
He was pretty convinced that the world was a dark and confusing place when he died, seeing it as being awash in danger and evil. As I read the daily headlines, I can understand how easy it might be to see things that way, and to lose hope, to lose sight of how fully goodness outweighs the evil in the world. Dr. Alexander says that evil exists so that we may experience free will and learn to use it wisely.
Yesterday, while I was driving through the countryside collecting photos, I drove through this tiny farm town, a village with a population under 400. To my surprise and delight, down the other lane of the highway that cut through the town came a parade! A color guard of four young teens led it, marching proudly in their Scouting uniforms, perfectly in step, solemnly bearing their flags. Next was a big tractor, driven by an old guy in a straw cowboy hat, pulling a float with a sign that proclaimed its occupant the Grand Marshall. He was even older than the man driving the tractor, grinning broadly and waving at the people who lined the highway. The Potato Queen rode the next float. And then there was the fire truck and a polished antique car and cheerleaders from the local high school. That was about the whole parade, and it looked like most of the village’s population had come out to cheer it.
I thought about how fairs and festivals and parades will be happening all over the planet as people celebrate the coming summer or, in the southern hemisphere, winter’s advent. Community still thrives.
I thought about all the young people graduating from high schools and universities this week, about all the young minds that are preparing themselves to be doctors and astronomers and teachers and artists, to explore the intricacies of math and science and the beauties of language and culture and the arts.
I thought about all the sports teams that play in the local fields, and all that kids will learn from participating in them about how to handle victory and defeat, about disciple and teamwork and striving to be your best. And that made me remember a video I saw this week about a brave young woman who became a champion gymnast even though she has no legs.
Yes, our world has its evils; but it is far richer in things that are good. And that’s true of each of our individual lives, too. We all have our crabby streaks, our shadow sides, and failings. But we learn from our unwise choices and keep reaching to be better, and stronger, and kinder, and to love more.
And in the end, it’s the plus side that will win out, no matter how dark things may sometimes appear.
Wishing you a week rich with awareness of life’s balance and beauty.
Warmly,
Susan