Several years ago, I lived down the street from a little boy who lived in poverty in a broken home. He was withdrawn, insecure, and painfully shy.
Then, when he was seven years old, his mother enrolled him in a small, one room school in the neighborhood. It was the practice in this school, his mother told me, to begin every morning with a routine that gradually changed her son’s life.
The children would form a circle, she said, place their hands over their hearts and shout out the affirmation, “I am Awake! Alert! Alive! Enthusiastic! The mark of success is upon me! I am a winner! I cannot fail!” Then they would cheer and clap their hands and begin their day.
The little boy thought this was great fun, and to encourage him, his mom and he started practicing the routine together at home before breakfast. As the days passed, both of them grew happier, healthier, and more confident in their abilities. The mom gave great credit to the chant.
Her story reminded me of a popular self-improvement method that emerged in the beginning of the 20th century. A French psychotherapist, Émile Coué, taught his patients to repeat the phrase, “Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better.” They were to repeat it at least 20 times throughout the day, especially when waking and going to sleep.
Today we credit the success and popularity of the method to a formation in our brains called the Reticular Activating System (RAS). It works as a dynamic, living filter that determines what data—out of the billions of bits of incoming sensory data—to send to our awareness. It makes its choices based on what it determines is important to us.
It learns what’s important to us by listening to our dominant thoughts, both positive and negative. If we’re repeatedly telling it that we’re losers, that nothing ever goes right for us, it will show us all the proof we need to convince us our opinion is true. But if we feed it the thought that we’re constantly improving, that will become our reality.
In her video about the RAS, popular author and podcaster Mel Robbins shares an exercise that will let you experience for yourself how your RAS works. For the next five days, she says, tell yourself that you want to find an image of a heart in your environment.
It could appear as a rock or a leaf or a stain on someone’s shirt, a piece of food, anything. When you spot it, take a moment to recognize how satisfied you feel, and maybe take the object (or a picture of it) home with you as a souvenir.
You’ll be surprised how you keep finding hearts, Mel says. And you’ll have a taste of how your RAS works. Check out Mel’s YouTube video about the RAS for a more in-depth description of the way it shapes your life and how you can put It to work for you.
If the find-a-heart exercise doesn’t appeal to you, invite yourself to practice Dr. Coué’s famous phrase throughout your day: “Every day, in every way, I’m getting better and better.”
Say it to yourself as you wake and go about your morning routine. Say it before sleep. Let it be the recurring song in your day.
Pay attention to the thoughts and images that come to you as you imagine what “better” might be.
Notice the interventions that happen in your life, the new choices and ideas that appear, the way you feel.
It’s an interesting game with cool rewards. Give it a whirl.
Be well and prosper.
Warmly,
Susan
Image by TheUjulala from Pixabay