It might not be your uncle. It might be a cousin or an in-law or a neighbor or niece. But “uncle” is as good a word as any. Whoever it is, you only see him when you have to. If you’re lucky, it’s only a couple times a year at family gatherings, for which you are exceedingly grateful.
If your luck falls another way and your ‘uncle’ constantly appears in your life, well, the best I can advise is to consider that he’s a teacher, come to show you a thing or two. That’s how it’s been in my life anyway. And for that I am grateful, as loathsome as the lessons seemed from time to time.
Uncles are like this: You think he’s a stick-in-the-mud, and he thinks you’re a bit of a kook. You kind of irritate each other. No grudges stand between you. Each of you sees that the other is likable enough to plenty of folks. Your reality bubbles just don’t jibe.
I’m telling you this because I got to see a mismatched pair of fellows like that in a live stream this last week. I actually did laugh out loud as I watched. The uncle in this case was wholly oblivious to the fact that he unfailingly missed the other man’s point. As the man stared at this uncle, dumbfounded by him and in utter frustration, you could tell that less-than-friendly thoughts were zipping through his head. Nevertheless, to his credit, he contained himself and managed a controlled tactfulness.
I laughed because it was like watching myself and my own ‘uncle.’ It’s just what we’re like.
The other reason I wanted to talk about the uncles we can’t stand is because the holidays are here and a lot of us will be running into such folks. Remember the saying I share with you from time to time: “We like each other because. We love each other anyway.”
Let yourself get a 40,000 foot view of things. See how all of us are just being human the best way we know how. It’s kind of endearing, really, in a poignant sort of way. I say we all let ourselves surrender our irritations to the morning sky and exchange them for compassion, a will to kindness, maybe even some affection and a broadened sense of humor. It’s all a matter of perspective. And we have the freedom to change ours at will. Isn’t that beautiful?
And isn’t it the perfect time of year for us to be grateful for life’s uncles? My own, by the way, has become a dear friend. And still there are days when I can hardly stand him. It’s just the way it is. I gotta love him anyway.
My thoughts are with you, dear ones. May you journey with ease and joy.
Warmly,
Susan